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Wednesday, November 22, 2017

Super Genius: Wile E. Coyote vs. Round Earth Freemasons


Just in time for Thanksgiving, here is your Wild Turkey Surprise

On Saturday, Apple Valley, California limousine chauffeur and frustrated rocket engineer Mike Hughes is going to prove the Earth really, really, REALLY is flat, after all. That day, he'll board his home-built, steam-powered rocket out in the Mojave Desert, count down, blast off, reach a terrifying top-speed velocity of 500mph, and soar to an eardrum-popping 1,800-foot apogee in order to peer back down at the surface himself, and in his words, "shut the door on this ball earth" once and for all. 

Because, you see, according to Hughes, the only reason anybody falls for the silly old theory of a globe in space orbiting the Sun is because? 

You guessed it. 

NASA is controlled by "round-Earth Freemasons."

Oh, along with Elon Musk faking so-called "rocket launches" - so called - with blimps.

Here's the important bits from from the Washington Post today. Feel free to hum the Stonecutters theme while you read it:
Hughes promised the flat-Earth community that he would expose the conspiracy with his steam-powered rocket, which will launch from a heavily modified mobile home — though he acknowledged that he still had much to learn about rocket science.
“This whole tech thing,” he said in the June interview. “I’m really behind the eight ball.”
[snip]
He built his first manned rocket in 2014, the Associated Press reported, and managed to fly a quarter-mile over Winkelman, Ariz.
As seen in a YouTube video, the flight ended with Hughes being dragged, moaning from the remains of the rocket. The injuries he suffered put him in a walker for two weeks, he said.
And the 2014 flight was only a quarter of the distance of Saturday’s mile-long attempt.
And it was based on round-Earth technology.
Hughes only recently converted to flat-Eartherism, after struggling for months to raise funds for his follow-up flight over the Mojave.
It was originally scheduled for early 2016 in a Kickstarter campaign — “From Garage to Outer Space!” — that mentioned nothing about Illuminati astronauts, and was themed after a NASCAR event.
“We want to do this and basically thumb our noses at all these billionaires trying to do this,” Hughes said in the pitch video, standing in his Apple Valley, Calif., living room, which he had plastered with drawings of his rockets.
“They have not put a man in space yet,” Hughes said. “There are 20 different space agencies here in America, and I’m the last person that’s put a man in a rocket and launched it.” Comparing himself to Evel Knievel, he promised to launch himself from a California racetrack that year as the first step in his steam-powered leap toward space.
The Kickstarter raised $310 of its $150,000 goal.
Hughes made other pitches, including a plan to fly over Texas in a “SkyLimo.” But he complained to Ars Technica last year about the difficulty of funding his dreams on a chauffeur’s meager salary.
A year later, he called into a flat-Earth community Web show to announce that he had become a recent convert.
“We were kind of looking for new sponsors for this. And I’m a believer in the flat Earth,” Hughes said. “I researched it for several months.”
The host sounded impressed. Hughes had actually flown in a rocket, he noted, whereas astronauts were merely paid actors performing in front of a CGI globe.
“John Glenn and Neil Armstrong are Freemasons,” Hughes agreed. “Once you understand that, you understand the roots of the deception.”
The host talked of “Elon Musk’s fake reality,” and Hughes talked of “anti-Christ, Illuminati stuff.” After half an hour of this, the host told his 300-some listeners to back Hughes’s exploration of space.
While there is no one hypothesis for what the flat Earth is supposed to look like, many believers envision a flat disc ringed by sea ice, which naturally holds the oceans in.
What’s beyond the sea ice, if anything, remains to be discovered.
“We need an individual who’s not compromised by the government,” the host told Hughes. “And you could be that man.”
Yeah, I know. John Glenn was, Neil Armstrong wasn't (it was Brother Aldrin on Apollo 11, actually). The serious list of known astronauts who were or are Freemasons is right here, out in plain sight, where everybody can find it.

Oh, never mind. 

But no Metric System, ever. It's down and it STAYS down. Let's play ping-pong.



UPDATE 11/26/2017:

Well, it seems Mr. Hughes was forced to scrub his launch Saturday over safety concerns.

According to the Daily Mail on Sunday, he was:

forced to halt his plans because he didn't have the required federal permits plus had mechanical problems with his 'motorhome/rocket launcher. 
In an announcement made on YouTube, he said that the US Bureau of Land Management 'told me they would not allow me to do the event... at least not at that location'.
'It's been very disappointing,' he added.

6 comments:

  1. Moreover, Earth is hollow and our interior is controlled by Odd Fellows.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Ladies and Gentlemen, here before you is another contender for a Darwin Award!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah, he might be a winner if he succeeds in eliminating himself from the gene pool. Think he only gets an honorable mention if he merely damages himself. Like all flat earthers, he is of course nuttier than a Christmas fruitcake.

      Delete
    2. I am embarrassed to admit that he lives in a town very close to me. Possible he has been out in the desert sun too long?

      Delete
  3. Have a great flight. Hope you don't fall off the edge!

    ReplyDelete

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